Leggings are not pants!

Like many other human beings, I have Facebook. Like many other females, I sometimes use my Facebook to rant, rage, and vent. This has been the case for the past three years, and I have absolutely no intention of changing it. I have a few reasons for this:

1.      All my friends, acquaintances and victims of my stalking tendencies are on Facebook.

2.      The people mentioned in 1 are very likely to catch a glimpse of (and maybe even pry their eyes away from the meaningless Facebook adverts on their right long enough to comprehend) my random bursts of passion.

3.      You can’t punch me through Facebook. And even if you could, the chances of my giving a pound of care are very slim.

With these reasons in mind, you can understand why Facebook is the home of my passive aggression. Recently, a rather strange phenomenon has been -God save my soul- catching my eye. I vented about it on my dear Facebook, but that did not give me much satisfaction.

So, I will vent about it again in my wonderful VentNest.

Ladies...leggings are not pants.

They are not jeans. They are not shorts. They are not skinny jeans. They are what your parents (for the black people) used to call tights. Did any of you ever see your mothers prancing around town in their tights and tank tops? No.  And if any of you have replied to this question in the affirmative, I grant you permission to find the highest bridge in your general area and explore its edges to your greatest capability.

You cannot continue to pretend that leggings are pants. I, for one, refuse to believe that any of you do not understand this basic concept. When they have the leggings in the section right next to the long tops at Mr Price, it is not because they have run out of space in the jeans section. No. It is to serve as a guide that encourages you to do your leggings justice (and save us from the trauma of seeing your good-as-bare bum jiggling in front of us at 07:45) and wear them with the already mentioned long top. I cannot stress how important it is for you to do this.

Not only is it important for you to do this, it is important for the rest of us feeble human beings in actual pants and underwear. If I do not see you jiggle in front of me after I have just eaten breakfast, I do not vomit. If I do not vomit, I am able to continue with the rest of my day in considerable contentment. If I continue with my day in considerable contentment, I do not have thoughts of ending my life. If I do not have thoughts of ending my life, I do not end up like one of those American kids who blow a fuse and pulverise every breathing thing in front of them. If I do not end up like one of those American kids, everybody’s happy.

So you see, if everybody is to be happy, you are to stop wearing leggings as pants and understand that the world is a happier place without your ass in its face.